In life, it’s natural to experience a wide range of emotions—from joy and excitement to sadness, anger, and fear. But many of us automatically push away these more difficult emotions, especially when they feel overwhelming or we want to appear “strong”. Avoiding emotions can have long-term consequences on both our mental and physical health. So, how can we learn to feel our emotions in a healthy way?
How Repressing Emotions Harms the Body and Mind
When we bottle up our emotions, we may think we’re maintaining control, but in reality, repressed emotions don’t just disappear—they linger beneath the surface.
Repression is a temporary fix that can actually make things worse. The more we avoid our emotions, the more they control us from behind the scenes.
Over time, the constant weight of this disconnection can manifest in physical health problems like tension, headaches, digestive issues, chronic stress and autoimmune diseases. And eventually, these emotions come out, often in unhealthy ways—through irritability, emotional outbursts, or feelings of detachment. What might start as low-level anxiety or stress can spiral into deeper issues, like persistent anxiety, depression, or burnout. Allowing ourselves to face and process our emotions is not just about mental health, but our overall well-being.
Learning to Feel Our Emotions
So how do we start truly feeling our emotions when we’ve been burying them for so long that we barely know what we want, who we are, or what we feel? It starts with giving yourself the space to simply notice, without forcing anything.
This is not easy, especially when you’re used to pushing feelings aside. But it’s about small steps. Let yourself experience what’s inside, without trying to make sense of it right away.
Pause and notice, what comes up? Where do you feel it? How does it feel in your body? Emotions don’t always make sense immediately, and that’s okay. You might not fully understand what you’re feeling at the moment, but trust that giving the emotion space will help it reveal itself in time. Sometimes there are lots of feelings coming up, and working with a therapist who can guide you through this at the right pace and with constant support is the best choice.
The First Step in Therapy
In therapy, the journey often starts with learning to feel comfortable and aware of our emotions. Before we can heal or make lasting changes, we need to reconnect with what we’re feeling inside. Stuff we’ve tried not to think about or feel for years can come up. When we stop running from our emotions and start being with them, we can process, heal, and move forward.
Emotions are part of being human, and feeling them is not a sign of weakness but a sign of true strength.
Sarah Turc
Psychologist